Pacing your relationship for marriage is an important aspect of dating that many take for granted or fail to put much thought into. Going too fast might scare off your partner or create a relationship that’s destined to fail. On the other hand, going too slow can make your partner lose interest and prevent a lasting bond from developing. Even though each relationship is different, there are several techniques you can use to make yours a success.
Early Dating Period
Resist the urge to get caught up in passion and rush things, either physically or emotionally. A whirlwind romance is likely to crash and burn as fast as it started. A lasting relationship needs more than just a few weekends of lust and passion. Slow things down and enjoy the intrigue of getting to know your partner. Take the time to see if a strong emotional bond begins to develop between the two of you as you learn more about each other. If your partner has fundamental character traits that are incompatible with yours, this might be the time to cut the relationship loose.
Three to six months of dating is a typical amount of time to start considering what type of commitment you are each looking for in the relationship. Spending considerable time with your partner over a period of time will make him more comfortable around you, and eventually you’ll start to see his true colors. Sometimes it’s the little things, such as your partner’s taste in music or the arts, that can cement your decision about him. The longer you date, and the more time you spend with each other, the better you will begin to recognized each other’s likes, dislikes, habits and ambitions. Again, take your time to build the relationship to make sure you aren’t acting out of insecurity or out of an irrational belief that things need to progress at a faster pace. The pace of your relationship is too slow only if it becomes a detriment to moving forward.
One Year and On
A year of dating should give you a good idea if you’ve found your life partner. The love between the two of you should still be growing or at least reached a stable level. Anything you need to know about your partner is likely to have come up by now. You’ve probably survived a few fights by this time. Communicate with your partner about her intentions going forward. See if you’re both on the same page regarding marriage and family. Instead of waiting for a specific time to propose, wait for your relationship to be deep enough that marriage is the next obvious step. When the time feels right, propose to your partner and begin the next stage of your lives together.
Ultimately, you’ll have to trust yourself to make the right decisions moving forward. Dating tips and advice from friends can only help so much. You’re the only one in who knows exactly how you feel inside and what you want to happen next. Focus on moving at the pace that is right for your specific relationship. It’s important to let things develop naturally and not over think everything. Keep in mind that falling in love involves taking risks. You’ll never get anywhere if you let fear rule your decisions.